Monday, September 8, 2008

I Don't Get It

There are many things in this world that have been or currently are outrageously popular that I simply don't get. I've tried watching/listening/reading them, and can't figure out why the rest of the world is so crazy about it. Some are classics. I've tried even harder with these because a person really should appreciate the classics, but still...I've got nothing. It's not that I hated it (well, I hated some), I'm just not in love.

Here's a list of some of these things in no particular order:

Movies
The Godfather
Oklahoma
Citizen Kane
The current Batman
That 37 hour BBC production of Pride and Prejudice

TV
American Idol
Survivor
Law and Order - twenty years on the air? Really? And with how many spin-offs? They coined the phrase "Ripped from the headlines!" I'm not interested.
Everybody Loves Raymond

Music
Nirvana
Depeche Mode
The Spice Girls
Shania Twain - Her third album is still the best-selling recording from a female artist ever. I'm not making that up.
Beyonce
Rihana
Kenney Chesney
All of those rappers

Books
Wuthering Heights
The DaVinci Code
War and Peace - Actually, I might have loved it if I'd gotten through it.
Anything from Anita Stansfield - My DB coworkers will know what I'm saying here. She's written roughly one thousand books, all of which LDS women from Ogden to Spanish Fork have eagerly bought up. I read one of her books, and it was the worst reading experience of my life. Man I hate that woman.

Hymns
First, let me promise you that I am not an apostate, and say that I certainly don't mean to offend anyone by dissing some hymns. It's just that there are some that different wards and Church Office Buildings I've been a part of have way over sung, leaving me wanting to groan every time I see them listed in the sacrament meeting program. There are so many other songs that are just as good, if not much better. I'm going to include Christmas songs here, too.

Because I Have Been Given Much
As Sisters in Zion
Oh My Father
A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief - This is a pretty song when done well, but most congregations don't do it well, and then it's just long.
I Believe in Christ - I feel bad writing this one, but it's true. Also too, too long.
Silent Night
I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
I am I Child of God

Celebrities
Why are these people famous?
Jessica Simpson
Paris Hilton
Nicole Ritchie
Courtney Love

There you have it. If anyone wants to defend any item on the list, please feel free. Maybe you can make me understand.

4 comments:

Tiffany said...

You crack me up. The best part of this post is that I can totally imagine you talking and saying all of this. I agree with 99.9% of the list and the hymn part made me laugh out loud. I think you need an appointment with your bishop.

Nicole said...

We agree on so many things, but I will defend the BBC Pride & Prejudice mini-series to the death. Also, you may keep your Lord of the Rings movie trilogy instead (too long, TOO LONG). Every time I see a magazine cover with Jessica Simpson on it I wonder what kind of world I live in. She hasn't been in a movie or had a successful record in YEARS. I don't care how she found love again.

Kelli said...

Ha-ha! I agree with almost everything on your list. I have to disagree on Pride and Prejudice. I love how it follows the book much closer than most versions and I do love Mr. Darcy. I think DB embittered my to poor Anita!

Melissa said...

I will not try to make you understand DM. Some people just can't :) Anyway I will at least try not to make you listen to it anymore. As for the Pride and Prejudice just one thing, Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy. You can't not convince me there has ever been a better one.